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A merger made in molasses

technofile  by al fasoldt

Columns and commentaries in a life-long dance with technology

Simple gray rule

A merger made in molasses

By Al Fasoldt

Copyright © 1991, The Syracuse Newspapers

Now the story can be told. An industry source whose name cannot be remembered has revealed that Microsoft, the software giant behind Windows 3 for the PC, and Apple Computer, the maker of the Macintosh, are about to merge.

The source says the two companies will announce their plan on Monday, the first day of April.

The first product of the joint company is expected to be a new computer code-named Molasses. It has a tiny black-and-white screen, takes six years to load Windows and draws cute things on your screen when all you want to do is get some work done.

This, of course, is a little April Fool's tale, a dig at both Microsoft and Apple. I found myself aiming unkind words at Microsoft this week when I tried out Ami Pro, a Windows word processor. It ran tooooo slow on my 286 PC to suit me at all. And the screen display, even on my Sony VGA monitor, was only so-so.

And Apple, for its part, shot itself in the foot when it ran an ad for its new printers in major magazines. At the bottom of the ad, Apple gave the list prices, and then placed this headline in red: "But who pays list prices any more?''

You can imagine how upset Apple's dealers are. Apple says it was a joke.

Yup, right in time for good old April Fool's Day.

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