Things You Can Learn in the Movies
During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.
If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade -- at any time of the year.
All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the Armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.
It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
Once applied, lipstick will never rub off -- even while scuba diving.
The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.
If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition even if you haven't been carrying any before now.
Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
Interbreeding is genetically possible with any creature from elsewhere in the universe.
Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.
If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.
The Chief of Police will always suspend his star detective -- or give him 48 hours to finish the job.
A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a large stadium.
Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
Although in the 20th century it is possible to fire weapons at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd century will have lost this technology.
Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts -- your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
Any lock can be picked using a credit card or a paper clip in seconds unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur, will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.
Although the technology for Caller ID was available in the mid 80s, and by 1997 had become so commonplace as to be nearly ubiquitous in normal civilian homes, somehow police departments and the FBI are limited to tracing calls the old-fashioned way, which always requires keeping the suspect on the phone for at least 60 seconds.
The above were provided by "Vince."
Hands or any part of the body never seem to require washing before or after any activity.
Bad odors are never mentioned even with the presence of wet animals or physical activity.
Body maintenance functions do not exist.
The main character always chooses the right solution the first time, even when it may seem unlikely.
The weather is always perfect while the plot is building and raining when the characters are experiencing emotional downs.
Characters are never bothered by flies or mosquitoes unless it is part of the story.
And the one that always gets me is that the bad guys always have a huge cavernous hideout and center of operations that is immaculate, modern and contains the latest electronic equipment but no visible means of support. Where did they get the millions of dollars for this setup?
Above provided by Carol.
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